Idiots on parade

I have a lot of respect for the police. They have a hard job. They should be able to get a decent meal while on the job. Instead some idiot fast food worker gets an idea: Loogie found in Trooper's wrap.

When Michigan cops arrested a teenage restaurant employee earlier this month for adulterating a state trooper's Arby's grub, they declined to say what landed in the poor guy's turkey wrap. But a Freedom of Information request has unlodged a police report that, The Smoking Gun can now reveal, shows that a "LOOGIE" was the unwanted ingredient. According to a police report, a copy of which you'll find below, Stephen Bullion, 19, admitted to the clamming after being confronted by the trooper, who only spotted the phlegm after eating half of his "roast turkey, ranch 'n bacon wrap." Bullion, pictured at right, told the trooper (whose name was redacted from the report) that he did not add the loogie because the customer was a cop, but rather because he arrived at the drive-thru window as workers were preparing to close the fast-food joint. If convicted of the adulteration charges, Bullion faces more than a decade in prison.

Dumb, dumb, and dumber...er.